Can Money Be A Relapse Trigger?

Money, cash, moola, dinero, guap, we all have money and need money daily. The world is changing and more transactions are becoming electronic. One area that has not changed is the drug trade. Cash is still king within the drug trade. I have yet to meet a dealer who accepts credit card payments on their phone, but then again some do Cashapp and Venmo so they’re on their way.

Cash is one of those interesting things that is life and death during addiction. Addicts don’t understand the true value of money when they’re in the grips of addiction. We will hand over the rent money without a second thought. Once we get in recovery, it can become a major issue for multiple reasons.

Is Money A Relapse Trigger?

Money can be a huge relapse trigger for many people in early sobriety. During active addiction, addicts associate cash with getting high. Their brains create memories and connections linking the sight of cash with getting drugs. Once in recovery, many addicts will have intense cravings at the sight of cash. They immediately associate cash with being able to buy drugs. Prolonged drug-use rewires the addict’s brain. Their brain starts to associate money = drugs and drugs = pleasure.

What makes this trigger so hard to overcome is we all need money to live. Money is everywhere in the world. How can we expect an addict to avoid money during their recovery? We can’t. Learning and using tools to mitigate the exposure to cash in early recovery is essential for a long-term sober life. This is something I had to work on every day in early sobriety, and I couldn’t do it alone.

Why Is Cash/Money Such A Big Relapse Trigger?

Many of us addicts started out using drugs or alcohol like “normal people“, casually here or there, on the weekends, or at parties. As our addiction progressed we began to put drugs higher and higher in our daily routine of necessities. As this progresses, we need larger amounts of drugs, more often, to achieve the high we are chasing.

When this progression starts, we will undoubtedly start spending increasingly more amounts of money on drugs. Our brain starts to associate drugs as something we need to survive, and we can’t get drugs without money. We start associating, money = drugs = survival. This process begins to create internal memories of our drug use. Just like seeing a puppy may bring back memories of your dog when it was a puppy and you instantly start to smile. This is what happens when addicts see cash. They view cash as their key to getting drugs. 

My brain remembers being in withdrawal and feeling like I was going to die. I pawned some items, which got me cash, cash got me drugs, drugs made me feel better and got rid of withdrawals.  Thousands of these events happened to me over my using days. Every time something like this happened it created more internal cues and pathways in my brain. I began associating cash with my medicine, cash with survival, cash with pleasure. CASH = NO WITHDRAWAL. 

How To Overcome Cash/Money As A Relapse Trigger?

To overcome this association, we have to start making new and positive associations with money. Many of us addicts have no idea of the true value of money is. I walked into my dealer’s house and handed him my entire paycheck like it was nothing. Normal people look at that and say “Are you nuts? That’s half the rent money”.

During addiction, addicts don’t see the reality of money because the drugs are taking over their logical thoughts. In recovery, we have to begin to associate money with its true value and meaning. Money isn’t just some tool used to cop drugs. Cash is needed for food, shelter, and clothing. Money is earned by hard work and shouldn’t be handled loosely.

Overcoming these feelings and associations with money will take time and patience. As with most other triggers, it gets easier to manage over time. 

How To Deal With Cash/Money In Early Sobriety

There are many tools we can use to avoid having cash on us in early sobriety. Some things addicts in early recovery should avoid are:

1. Having cash on their person
2. Using ATM’s and debit cards
3. Making large purchases
4. Being in charge of all the bills

These may be harder for some than others. If you don’t have a positive family support system you may not be able to avoid having cash. If you have kids and need to be the main breadwinner then it might be unrealistic to avoid making large purchases. Even if you don’t have family support to lean on, use your recovery support system. Before handling cash call your sponsor. If you need to make a big purchase have a friend go with you.

No matter what the situation, there are tools and tips to help you navigate the triggers. Family support helped me through this time. I am lucky and blessed to have a great family that I could trust with my money. The whole process of getting my paycheck, going to cash it, and getting the cash, was a huge trigger for me. Having a loved one take care of this for me and hold the money was unbelievably helpful. 

Helpful Ways To Deal With Money In Early Sobriety

Everyone’s situation is different, but no matter what your situation we all have positive sober support who can help us navigate this tough time. If you don’t have any sober support check out this article on building a positive sober support network. Having and Building A Positive Support Network In Recovery. 

1. Have A Trusted Family Member Manage Your Money In Early Sobriety

I understand everyone may not have someone they can count on for this. For those that do, this is a great tool to avoid having cash on you. In my early recovery, I had a family member hold all my money. Every week we went and filled up my gas tank and bought a prepaid card with $50 on it for lunch and emergencies. This was a great help so I knew I only had that card on me and not a bunch of cash or credit cards.

When my bills came we sat down and paid them. My trusted family member was with me the whole time.

2. Avoid ATM’s If Possible

Many of us addicts associate ATM’s with getting cash for drugs. We also have this view that ATMs just spit out cash. We don’t pay as much attention to the true value of money because it’s so easy to get. The prepaid card helped me avoid the ATM.

3. Have Your Paycheck Direct Deposited

Taking a paper check to the bank or check cashing store is not a good idea. Then you’ll be walking out of the bank on a Friday with a bunch of cash and free time. This can be a major issue. Fridays are notorious relapse days. Much of the country, addicts and not addicts alike, associate Fridays with happy hour, partying, and the start to the weekend. Direct deposit ensures we don’t have the cash in our hands on a Friday evening.

If you must get a paper check then call your sponsor before and after cashing the check. Also, make plans to meet someone in recovery right after cashing the check. This will help you be accountable to yourself and your sobriety. If you must have a paper check go to the bank to cash it.

Avoid check-cashing stores! These places are designed to get your money. They have one counter for cashing your paycheck and right next to that counter is a lotto/ liquor counter. This is no mistake. People cash their checks then say “well it’s Friday I can get a few bottles of Whiskey for the weekend”. 

4. Talk With Family and Friends About Triggers

In my early recovery, I needed to explain to my family and friends that cash was a trigger for me. Your family doesn’t know this is a trigger. They may hand you cash for a present or repayment and not think twice about it. You may not think it’s a big deal at that time, but an hour later when you leave the party and have a pocket full of cash you may be tempted to go get high.

5. Embrace Digital and Electronic Payments

Advances in technology allow us to avoid physical cash. This is great for avoiding having cash but may cause a different issue. Many of us addicts are terrible money managers. If you use Cashapp, Venmo, PayPal, or online payment systems to pay for everything, make sure you are following and keeping track of your expenses.

It can be very easy to lose track of spending and get in debt. We lived our lives in total chaos up to that point and never monitored our spending. If we don’t change that thinking in early sobriety we may get ourselves into massive debt. 

6. Create New Positive Associations With Money

We need to break those old habits and associations we created during years of addiction. Paying for small purchases with cash can help slowly rewire the brain to view money differently. Understanding and learning how to manage and budget our money is a great way to start making positive associations. Some Associations That Helped Me:

• 10 hours of work = $150 – $150 is my monthly car payment
• My weekly paycheck is half this months rent – Handing it over to some dealer would mean 45 hours of work down the drain.
• $200 will feed the kids for 2 weeks which is way more important than 2 days of getting high.

Take a few minutes to sit down and write a budget. This will help to understand the importance of money management and the true value of money. Create whatever associations fit into your life. The basic principle is understanding that money is more than a tool to get high. It has real value.