When a person gets sober from drugs and alcohol, life doesn’t magically become easy. There is a lot of work and self-reflection required to get on the path toward a happy and healthy long-term recovery from addiction. The most common misconception society has about sobriety is that it’s just about quitting drugs and alcohol.Yes, putting down the substance is the first step, but it’s just one piece of the puzzle. A healthy recovery program needs to be maintained on a daily basis.
One of the common sayings in addiction recovery is people can put down the drink and drugs but still not be sober. That may be confusing for people not involved in the addiction-recovery community to understand. Being sober is more than not having drugs or alcohol in your system. It’s having a healthy and happy lifestyle. I have met some people who haven’t had a drink in decades but are miserable.The people who are living their best life on a daily basis in recovery have common habits they follow. These habits help us maintain and grow our recovery program.
10 Common Habits of People With A Healthy Recovery Program
1. They Stay In The Center of Their Recovery Program
The Antelope in the back of the pack is always the first one to get eaten by the lions. Staying in the center of the pack is the best way to stay secure in your recovery program. The people that are actively involved in their recovery programs on a daily basis are always the happiest and healthiest. Whatever recovery program you follow, there are ways to stay in the center of that program. Staying in the center allows for a positive connection with many others in recovery.
Some Great Ways To Stay In The Center of Your Recovery Program:
Service Positions – (coffee maker, Speaker seeker, Greeter, Clean up crew)
Arrive early and stay late to help set up and clean up
Offer to give people rides
Get on the boards or committees that run the program
Volunteer at rehabs or other recovery events
2. They Understand That Time Takes Time
Many of us in recovery expect our lives to be back to normal within a few weeks of getting sober. We didn’t destroy our lives overnight and we can’t rebuild them overnight. It takes years to repair and rebuild our lives, after all, we spent years, even decades drinking and drugging. People with a healthy recovery program understand this and work on 1 thing at a time. Trying to rebuild everything at once is a recipe for disaster.If you’re looking for more specific tips on the rebuilding process check out this article –12 Tips To Rebuild Your Life After Addiction.
3. They Use Tools To Reduce Stress On A Daily Basis
We all know how dangerous stress can be for our health, this is particularly true for people in recovery. Excessive stress can cause a relapse that we never recover from.Stress-reducing habits are an essential part of a healthy recovery program. People with healthy recovery programs always have multiple ways they reduce their stress levels on a daily basis. These may include:
Yoga
Meditation
Exercise/Fitness
Volunteering
Journaling
Playing With Our Pets
Everyone has their own way of coping with stress, the key is to practice them on a daily basis. The better we are at managing our stress the better our mental health will be.
4. They Connect With Others In Recovery Every Day
It’s often said that the opposite of addiction is connection(source). Connecting with others in recovery allows us to step outside ourselves and be there for others. Some days we may be the one helping them, other days they’re helping us. Reaching out and connecting with others is an essential part of any healthy recovery program. I’m a big believer in face-to-face connection but sometimes this isn’t always possible. Phone calls, facetime, zoom calls, or texting with others in recovery is a great positive way to start your day.
5. They Know How To Set Boundaries
Giving back to others is a key piece of recovery, but knowing when to say NO is essential. Many people in recovery can get caught up in saying yes to everyone and everything because they feel guilty about their past behaviors and mistakes. Attempting to please everyone is mentally exhausting and will almost always end in a relapse.
People with a healthy recovery program understand they have to set boundaries for their own health and well being. When we set clear boundaries and stick to them, the people in our lives respect these limits.
I love that quote because it forces us to look in the mirror. If we allow ourselves to be a doormat then people will treat us that way. It may take time to find the balance between offering help and saying no, but it will come with time and a positive recovery program. NO, is a complete sentence. We don’t always have to justify and explain why we can’t do something.
6. They Surround Themselves With Positive People
People, Places, and things. If you’ve been to any recovery program you’ve heard the counselor tell you to change your people, places, and things. This is crucial during early recovery. I believe people is the most important one of those 3. Anyone who is happy in recovery is surrounding themselves with like-minded positive people. Being around positive people in recovery will help boost your mood, motivate you, and create a general sense of well being.
If a person in our lives is a negative influence, we need to set those healthy boundaries and respectively tell that person that their attitude is affecting our recovery program. Hopefully, they’ll understand and respect that decision. If not we may have to limit the time we spend with them or cut them out of our lives altogether.
Living in the past or in the future doesn’t accomplish anything for us. It’s good to make plans and set goals for the future, but planning is different than setting expectations for how things will play out. People who live in the present moment are always in a better place mentally than someone who’s in a constant state of anxiety thinking about future events.
It’s essential to face our past and come to terms with any damage we may have caused. When we do this with a therapist or sponsor we face the issues, rectify them, then move on. If we constantly dwell on past mistakes it will drag us down. I have found that the best way for me to rectify my past mistakes is to be the best person I can be today.
If you’re having trouble living in the present moment because you’re worried about the future, here’s a good exercise that has helped me. Write down all the things you’re anxious about and put them in a jar. Do this every night for 2 weeks. Wait a couple of weeks, open the jar, and read all the things you wrote down. The majority of the time at least half of them never happened, a good portion solved themselves without any worry, and the rest ended up being a minor issue, even though weeks before in my head I made them out to be world war 3.
During addiction we didn’t just put our physical health on the back burner, we totally forgot it existed. Drugs and alcohol were the top priority every day. This meant health and hygiene were neglected. Part of recovery is repairing the damage we have caused during our addiction. This includes damage to our own bodies.
People with a healthy recovery program get regular checkups with their doctor to make sure everything is running smoothly on the inside. Part of any healthy recovery program is physical fitness.Exercise in any form is great for our mind and body. You may not be a gym person, and that’s fine, exercise can be as simple as a daily walk around the block.
All around the country fitness-based recovery programs are popping up because so many members of the sober community incorporate fitness into their recovery program. A great example of this is Rocovery Fitness (rocoveryfitness.org). Combining recovery and fitness is genius for someone like myself who loves to workout. When I go to places like recovery I get to work out with like-minded people who are also in recovery.
9. They Practice An Attitude of Gratitude
Being thankful for what we have and how far we have come is a huge way to boost our mood. Anyone with a healthy and happy recovery program practices some form of gratitude on a daily basis. Some people make gratitude lists, others say prayers. When depression or worry starts to seep in, a simple gratitude list can help put things into perspective and remind me of the major blessings I already have.If you’re struggling with a gratitude list, start by calling a loved one and telling them you love them.
10. They Stay Busy and Have Fun
Deadtime or boredom can be a huge trigger for people in early sobriety. Part of any healthy recovery program is knowing how to stay busy with positive activities and hobbies. This may be a healthy mix of work, recovery, exercise, hobbies, and time with friends and family.
One trait that sets happy people in recovery apart from the rest is they know how to stay busy and find new hobbies. Many of our old hobbies revolved around drinking or getting high. In sobriety, we need to find new and fun ways to stay busy.Explore and try new things. Say YES when friends in recovery ask you to go to dinner or come play cards. Explore and try new things such as hiking, skiing, playing chess, or volunteering. Sobriety Doesn’t = Misery!
Kyle Ruggeri, CARC (Certified Addiction Recovery Coach) is a recovering addict/alcoholic. Kyle created Soberdogs Recovery as a way to get accurate and first-hand information about addiction and recovery out to the world. Kyle has been in recovery for over 5 years.
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